NEWS for North Dakotans
Agriculture Communication, North Dakota State
University
7 Morrill Hall, Fargo, ND 58105-5665
March 5, 1998
Kim Bushaw, Parent Line Program Specialist
NDSU Extension Service
The alarm beckons the sleeper to rise on yet another day. Lynn pushes the snooze and covers her head. Another dreaded day of school. Maybe she doesn't feel well. She knows she's tired; perhaps she should stay home today. How could she get out of going? "School is boring," she often reports to her worried parents.
Lynn was an average student who enjoyed school through kindergarten and first grade. When she was in second grade, her favorite grandmother died. Shortly after that, Lynn came down with pneumonia and missed several weeks of school. Her parents worried a little about all the absence but assumed she would catch up—and anyway, it was only grade school. They were a little surprised when the teacher suggested Lynn repeat second grade. Her parents reluctantly agreed.
School is not a positive place for Lynn. Academically she gets by; emotionally she's depressed. She knows she flunked. So do her classmates. She's never felt like she's fit in with this class. Being retained was a turning point for her, but not a positive one.
In a new study of North Dakota students, North Dakota State University faculty Kevin Thompson and Laura DeHaan found that being old for their grades—meaning at least one full year older than their classmates—can be especially difficult for girls. Thompson and DeHaan surmise that boys are more likely to be old for their grades, therefore attaching less social stigma to their situation than girls do.
Their research reveals that old-for-grade girls are almost twice as likely as their classmates who are in the "right" grade to attempt suicide. This difference is particularly marked in the transition year to senior high school.
Thompson and DeHaan also point out that previous studies have found that both old-for-grade boys and girls may see an increase in mental health problems, sexual activities and delinquency as well as truancy and dropping out of school.
So if repeating a grade or starting school a year late causes this kind of potential trouble, what can we do with children who aren't keeping pace with their age-mates? We generally think in terms of two options—pass or hold back. In truth, there may be several preferred options. According to an article by Lorrie Shepard, University of Colorado, and Mary Lee Smith, Arizona State University, "remedial help, before- and after-school programs, summer school, instructional aides to work with target children in the regular classroom, and no-cost peer tutoring are all more effective than retention."
Parents need to be involved in their children's schooling in a variety of ways to ensure success from the very beginning. When school budgets are tight, it may be a stretch to think that extra help can be found. But parents, grandparents and teens who are willing to staff a homework room before or after school, listen to and encourage individual children while they read, and share other types of tutoring help can be found anywhere.
Sometimes it takes a little creativity and prompting, but involving other caring people in the school setting will pay off in the long run, especially when you add up the cost savings of not retaining the child. First there is the obvious extra year or more of school to be funded. Then the social costs of a delinquent, truant or sexually active child. The costs become even higher when depression and suicide are added to the list.
This is the time of year when decisions about school placement are made. Consider all the options and services available in your community. Consider, too, what you as a parent will do to help your own child and others. Just because your school doesn't offer these services now doesn't mean a plan and a nudge couldn't get a move in that direction. Lynn and lots of children just like her may go to your child's school. Maybe Lynn is your child. What will you do to help?
More than 100 Parent Line columns are in the book "Please Tell Me This is Just a Stage." To order, send $9.95 per copy to Distribution Center, Box 5655, NDSU, Fargo, ND 58105-5655.
Kim Bushaw answers the Parent Line, an information and listening support warmline for North Dakota parents from the NDSU Extension Service. Call the Parent Line at 1-800-258-0808 (231-7923 in Fargo) with questions about this column and other parenting topics.
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Source: Kim Bushaw (701) 231-1070
Editor: Becky Koch (701) 231-7875