NEWS for North Dakotans
Agriculture Communication, North Dakota State University
7 Morrill Hall, Fargo, ND 58105-5665

January 14, 1999

Parent Line: The Moral of the Story

Kim Bushaw, Parent Line Program Specialist
NDSU Extension Service

For more than a week now I have been cleaning out the basement. This has been a slow process indeed involving two weekends and several nights in between, but it's nearly over. My original goal was to sort and pack all of our remaining toys in an orderly fashion so we can find just the right ones when our young friends stop for a visit. This has given me the opportunity to trek back through several stages of my own children's history and to share stories as I run across items that spark a memory.

What I was most surprised by was the lack of children's books in the collection. I love children's books and still buy them pretty frequently. We give them for gifts and read them to our young friends. I push parents to use books to help explain tough situations like death and divorce or just to unwind with.

We visit the library regularly, and my children had their own library cards to "rent" (their words) books even when they were very young. So, where in all of these toys were the books? A quick tour to their rooms made me feel much better. Both children still have their own favorites tucked away in their rooms. They have given away many books throughout the years for shelter book drives and other donations, but the special books, those that said something more to them, are still on the shelves.

The Association for the Education of Young Children reminds us that books are important for children at many stages of life. Infants and toddlers who are cuddled and read to learn about words and the objects words represent. Parents can prop a cardboard book in front of the immobile infant so he can enjoy the bright simple pictures. Or point out and name specific objects on the page.

Toddlers enjoy favorite stories again and again and again and again... When the story becomes familiar to the child, let her take the lead and tell it in her own words. Choose books that repeat a line or two. One of our family favorites was "The Little Red Hen." Our toddlers would repeat with great expressions, eyes wide and giant smiles the victorious line "And She Did!" as they enjoyed all the power that came with the words.

Preschoolers know that when bedtime comes, "just one more book, please" can stall the inevitable. One 4-year-old tells me that sometimes story time is the best time of his day. Books can be a great transition from an energized activity to a calmer one. Preschoolers are happy to correct anyone who skips a word or phrase in their favorite book. Add more challenging books but keep the old favorites too. Children will begin to read the pictures and be curious about what the print on the page means.

School-age children are able to make decisions about books for themselves at the library or bookstore. Gift certificates for books make great gifts for children with growing interests. Continue to read to your children even after they have learned to read by themselves.

William Kilpatrick of Boston College adds another dimension to reading with children. In his article "The Moral Power of Good Stories," he reminds us of the richness of the character education that is an important part of so many books. His picks include more than 100 books for readers to learn the importance of respect, responsibility, trustworthiness and all of the other virtues many feel the world is lacking today.

Here are a few children's books you may remember. "Aesop's Fables," where each story has a moral. "The Little Boy Who Cried Wolf" clearly illustrated to me that lying was a dangerous thing to do. How about you? "Little House in the Big Woods" gave us the Ingalls family who pulled together for the greater good. "April Morning" is a book about a young boy in the American Revolution who grows in responsibility and earns trust. And resilience is the resounding message in "Island of the Blue Dolphins."

Parents are in charge of teaching children these important concepts, but what better place to have them reaffirmed than with a good book. Reading books is often our way of passing on our stories to another generation. I'm glad my children had the good sense to keep their favorites tucked away from their mother's garage sale marker.

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More than 100 Parent Line columns are in the book "Please Tell Me This is Just a Stage." To order, send $9.95 per copy to Distribution Center, Box 5655, NDSU, Fargo, ND 58105-5655.

Kim Bushaw answers the Parent Line, an information and listening support line for North Dakota parents from the NDSU Extension Service. Call the Parent Line at 1-800-258-0808 (231-7923 in Fargo) with questions about this column and other parenting topics. The Parent Line is answered 7:30 a.m. - 9:15 p.m. Monday through Thursday and 7:30 a.m. - 4:00 p.m. Friday.

Source: Kim Bushaw (701) 231-1070

Editor: Becky Koch (701) 231-7875